Next time, perhaps!

A blog by a tiny, bored worker

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Meh days

25th August 2019

My friend did come! Like around 1am… he came and brought me arak Bali and CT, a traditional alcoholic brew. I thought I was the one who needed to get drunk but apparently… he got drunk more than I am??? I was shocked at first but anyway, it’s actually fun to listen to people talk.

In the morning, well not that morning, around 2pm we decided to get some food. Boy he was so drunk he puked and puked but finally after a few hot tea and water, he could manage to stand up lol. He drove his Vespa, initially we wanted to eat at Blok M but we saw Eatlah at Mayestik and so we ate that instead. Not a bad choice lol.

I quite like that day since I wasn’t really lonely and actually talked with a friend.

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The wave

23rd August 2019

I have to say sorry for not posting anything while good things happened yesterday! So, apparently, yesterday marked the third year I first messaged Robin on app lol. We actually put that in our calendar, to make up our anniversary date. I suggested to match it with her birthday but she didn’t want to lol.

Yesterday, like usual, in the morning I worked. Colleague told me she decided to leave the company. I’m so happy for her, because clearly she doesn’t like the company and I think the feeling is mutual haha.

In the afternoon, my partner’s mom came to town along with her sister. I decided to meet them because I’m lonely and also I think I just want to get to know her better. So we had dinner around their place and we talked. I think she likes me, or at least I hope so.

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Seeing the shrink

Today I finally went to get professional help from a shrink. It was quite interesting. Some people may feel this is a brave decision and whatnot but I think it’s quite… alright? Life has been boring recently and I feel some kind of changes will be good for me so honestly, I don’t see me going to the doctor is an achievement haha (but I do accept compliments lol).

It wasn’t planned AT ALL. This morning I was already prepared to come to the office. I’ve even stepped my foot in front of the building, but something stopped me. I couldn’t continue to walk into the office building… Well, I’ve arrived around 20mins late (blame it to the slow TransJakarta because I actually went out of the apartment earlier than usual).

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Hello… 2019 (what a basic bitch I am)

Gosh, it’s first May already, I don’t know why I bother to write this. Anyway a lot has happened to me from my last post, which in September 2018 until today.

To sum up, I’ve moved back to Jakarta, Indonesia, partner got a job in Sumatra, my relationship with colleagues went down to the rabbit hole.

Since end of last year, my company asked if it’s okay to move me back to Indo. Well, I think it’s a great idea because then I can do lots of things like having meetings, trainings, etc, something I couldn’t do if I stay in Singapore. Also, I knew my partner would move back to Indo and find a job there, because of the government regulation.

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Silence?

I’ve never talked about my feelings anymore. Maybe it’s because I don’t feel insecure like my previous relationships. With Robin, I feel safe because she accepts me for who I am. I can see that she’s actually want us to last. I’m grateful for her.

It’s been two years we’re together. We’ve been apart for a year and we will reunite by the end of this month. I’m excited really, but scared at the same time. Will we be okay? When I told people about this plan, some cheered for us and some… reacted quite negatively. They said something like… it’s not gonna be as happy as it seems.

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Pindah blog WordPress.com ke WordPress.org!

Sabtu (9/6) lalu gue bosen banget di rumah sendirian aja. Mulailah gue utak-atik blog lama gue, next thing I know, gue udah bayar sekitar IDR550,000-an buat hosting dan domain untuk setahun. Gue PINDAH blog dari WordPress.com ke WordPress.org

Kalo ditanya kenapa pindah blog, pastinya bukan karena blog lama gue isinya sampah menye-menye sama orang yang sebenarnya ngga perlu dimenye-menyein (kalo penasaran sama postingan lama gue, cek tab relationship gue). Tapi, gue emang selalu bercita-cita untuk belajar bikin website sendiri, punya toko online, dan punya peternakan. Baby steps lah.

Gue bersyukur banget yalord pertama gue bikin blog dimulai dari WordPress, jadi setidaknya udah cukup familiar sama CMS WordPress. Gue emang ngga pernah tertarik sama B-spot, karena

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Dear Mother, How Many Times Do I Have to Come Out?

Coming out is like an additional, but required, stepping point for us LGBTQ people. When I’m talking to other lesbians, sooner or later the question “so do your parents/family/friends know about you being gay?” or something similar will come up. If the answer is “yes”, then the usual follow up question is how it has been received.  If they say “no”, one can only assume that the people around them are really religious – or that they’re just not ready.

Last year, I came out to my mom. Or, rather, I was outed by a “mystery” person, who I’m pretty sure was my brother, because I had been Skyping with my soul-wrenching ex-crush candidly in front of him, involving lots of “aku sayang kamu” (I love you) and giggles. Ugh. Can I take back all those feelings? My stomach hurts recalling the memories).

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